Our Family Dominates: The Birth And First Days of Agnes

Finally! Finally Agnes has arrived and we are all loving getting to know her. She actually wasn't really late at all, born on October 14 at 40 weeks and 5 days -- well within normal -- but I was determined to be ready for her to arrive as early as 37 weeks just in case the last two were the new trend (Gussie was born just after 38 weeks and Edie was born just after 37 weeks). I did have some early contractions between 37 and 38 weeks but nothing serious, and at first was just happy that she made it past 37 weeks since that is the cutoff for "full term" and a homebirth.

When she was past 39 weeks, I asked her very nicely if she could just stay put through the weekend because we had a really busy weekend of multiple overlapping soccer games on Saturday and the girls' first craft fair on Sunday. She obliged and then I asked her really nicely if she could just wait until the end of the week because Michael was scheduled to be on a diocesan wide retreat from Tuesday through Thursday, three hours away. I had still been having random bouts of unorganized contractions since about 37 weeks, but the night before Michael was supposed to leave I had about three hours of building and strengthening contractions, enough to put my midwife on alert, then they died off and nothing. Still, if Michael had been three hours away, I would have called him after about that first hour thinking he would barely make it home in time. Neither of us liked the idea of him driving all the way out there and then potentially having to turn around and drive back and still (given my history of precipitous births) possibly missing Agnes' birth anyway, so he decided to cancel his spot on the retreat the morning he was supposed to leave. Since he had already cancelled or covered all of his masses and work for the week, he basically had a week of vacation at home - the perfect time for Agnes to be born!

She declined.

Her due date passed, Michael's week off passed, and I continued to have noticeable but random contractions, but no more several hour long episodes of more serious labor. And I was a tiny bit upset with in-utero Agnes for squandering what could have been a beautiful week of babymooning at home with the whole family.

So Michael went back to working like normal at the end of the week, and I again asked in-utero Agnes if she wouldn't mind staying put for the weekend, because Michael had a 5k to run Saturday morning and the kids had work and soccer games and if she decided to come on a Sunday morning there would be little I could do to get ahold of Michael at church and little he could do to get Mass covered on short notice.

It was about 10pm Saturday night that I informed Michael that I was pretty sure Agnes was going to be born on Sunday morning.

My midwife arrived around 11pm, and I woke Mary up around midnight because she made me promise no matter what that she could be there for the birth (the rest of the kids slept). Most of Agnes' labor wasn't too terrible, but the last 20 minutes or so was the worst I can remember of all of them. It kind of felt like a horse just kept rearing up and stomping on my abdomen without stopping or taking a break at all for 20 straight minutes. I know the end can be intense, but I really don't remember it being as non-stop with the others. Of course our highly intelligent brains are utterly useless when it comes to accurately remembering the facts and details of childbirth (I assume for the protection of the species as a whole) so maybe I just don't remember. Anyway, after that last 20 minutes of shattering horror, Agnes was born at 12:50am, briefly en caul (she came into the world in the bag of waters intact), and then immediately started screaming like crazy. All the other kids continued to sleep except Catherine, whom Mary woke right away.

Agnes was 8 pounds, 13 ounces, exactly the same weight as Gussie, and 19.5" long. She passed all her early assessments with flying colors and has been latching and nursing well since the beginning. She has a little bit of soft fuzzy dark brown hair, and the tops of her ears are adorably flopped over (for the moment at least).

These are the first pictures we have of Agnes, the morning after (or of, I guess) she was born. Sorry, they're cell phone / iPod pictures in dim lighting.

And these are all from her first day. The big siblings in the house are SO excited to finally meet Agnes. A few of them might have gotten just a little bit stressed out once her official due date passed.

Between neighbors and friends and church people dropping off meals, and the big kids pitching in with laundry and dishes, things are feeling pretty manageable right now. And even if they weren't, she's worth it either way.

There have maybe been a few spars about who gets to hold Agnes when, or who had a longer turn, or who held her last, but they're figuring it out.

We tried to get a picture of her eyes and many faces. Right now her eyes are very very dark blue.

Can you see her little flop ears at the top? I love them. I have no idea if they'll stay like or not (I'm thinking probably not) but I still love them.

Maybe 3 days old here?

Of course, Daddy maintains the right to jump the sibling line and claim naptime snuggles whenever he wants.

In spite of the many willing sibling hands, they do lose interest eventually (well, except Mary, and sometimes Catherine) and they do still have other things they have to tend to (like school), and although Agnes doesn't seem to mind being passed around, if she's going to take a really good nap, it's generally wrapped up with me. Doesn't she look tiny? It's hard to remember that Edie was a full pound and a half smaller when she was born.